dark places

in doing the Work (which is what i call self-evaluating & breaking down certain aspects of myself to understand why i operate the way i do), i find that it is not enough to think & be positive, it is not enough to decorate my surroundings in affirmations, to watch self realization videos or read self help books...one can do all these things & more, while sweetening their tea exported from small villages in Africa with local honey, or alkalizing their water with Himalayan salt & choosing the perfect crystal to carry over their heart on a silver chain... all of these tools mean nothing until i dig down deep into my psyche & face my dark places...there is work to be done to understand why i have such great intentions & yet sabotage my own joy because i let that part of myself that wants only to survive & does not want to take a risk talk me out of taking a risk that could potentially launch me into realizing my dreams...it is all in the Mind & the Mind is a wonderland of possibilities or a nightmarish realm of mere existence...it is essential to the seeker that he or she develop a habit of meditation so as to silence the Mind if only to find that reboot button within that pulls one from The Program & allows one to develop their own Program...freeing your Mind isn't just a poetic call to Awaken... it is a call to roll up your sleeves & get to work... you must be tenacious & you must be willing to stay consistently cognizant of what you contribute to your own growth...& it requires that you be brave because in your dark places hides those parts of you that you won't acknowledge, but they're there... acknowledge them you must, embrace them even... this is is how we heal a broken world, by healing & loving ourselves first...💙🕉️💚

my name is maria cristina

carry you...

the unveiling

it is all sacred

quiet...

i remember my dad taking us to the Mogollan Rim (i was 8 yrs old)...i walked to a huge, flat rock that extended over the cliff & sat down cross legged, like i was getting ready to hear a story at the foot of a great storyteller, only the storyteller was the Wind as She moved through the trees i gazed out on...so many trees, so many different kinds of green! i remember that breathing in & out deeply & mindfully was natural to me back then, i didn't need a guide or self help cd (lol)...i just knew, i felt the sanctity of the moment, the sacred, simple quiet of my own thoughts in favor of the sounds coming from the forest around me...i felt that cool breeze on my face & through my hair & at eight years old i remembered...i remembered love, grace, quiet, peace...i remembered joy, i was joy...i was Spirit...when i tell people about that memory i am sometimes told i was kind of a weird kid...i guess maybe i was? but, years later, as an adult, finally i am more & more embracing my "weirdness" & i'm not faking who i am or what i believe so that others might like or respect me...i dig this track i'm on, i am good with being a little out there or, as i was told often in my childhood, living with my head in the clouds...my feet are firmly planted in the soil, digging in because, after all, i am a work in progress...i reflect on the many, many poor choices i have made & i am, one by one, forgiving myself for those errors in judgment...self forgiveness & self love are crucial to living your best life & to being an example...i am digging in & facing my own mirror, many times with great effort because the view can be dark, but i'm seeking the lessons taught by consequences & finding the light through it all...personal responsibility brings with it power, the kind of quiet strength that keeps one humble...there is a quiet i am feeling that has nothing to do with the noise outside of myself...i want to cultivate this quiet...i am in Love with this quiet & i know this quiet is God...i feel no need to prove what i know or to to argue with others over what they know...this is a place in my soul that gives me peace & needs no definition or explanation...i'm cool with it... :)

love, in its purest form

love, in its purest form does not cater to fear...love does not doubt...love is not jealous, love in its purest form allows for growth, in fact, within this love, one cannot help but grow, become a better person...it has taken me a long time to learn this...it's as tho' the doors in my heart have been thrown open & i am facing this beautiful open field...the sky is a deep blue, the breeze carries the scent of rain & i am free...free!  this is the good stuff indeed...

simply peace

just a thought i've been mulling over...through this happiness i'm feeling, i must remain unattached...some might not understand...here's my view...we're all looking for happiness & doing our best to run away from sadness...but why?  neither emotion is permanent, both are inevitable & both share an equal importance for the journey we're on...no, i think our focus should instead be on the acceptance of what is, the use of what we experience as tools to become all we strive to become & peace...simply peace...i think true joy comes from peace & really, what else can compare?  i think our most fundamental purpose is to remember who we really are, to wake up from the dream...for me, this is a spiritual ride & it's finally making sense...(disclaimer:  there were no Christians, Catholics, Muslims, Buddhists, Atheists, Hindus, Wiccans or anyone else intentionally challenged, bullied, ridiculed or harmed during the writing of these thoughts...they're just my thoughts)...just a lil moeism by moetif